It’s important to note that the point of this article isn’t to get you angry – that’s not very helpful, now, is it?
Rather, the goal here is to help you become better equipped to deal with your anger.
And keep you from blowing up in situations where you may be more likely to lose your cool (such as road rage).
If this approach resonates with you, then read on!
Anger Management
If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve been asked (or told) to work on your anger issues.
You know what we mean by anger issues. Everyone has those moments when they lose their cool, or even act out in violent ways.
Anger can take many forms and is usually based on negative feelings—like fear or frustration—that need a healthy outlet.
When it comes to dealing with anger, there are two things you should do: learn how to control it, and figure out why it happens in the first place.
Here are some tips that
will help you get started.
Why is it so hard to control our emotions?
One reason we get so angry when we get into conflict is that our high-strung emotions make us misinterpret other people’s intentions.
That makes it hard for us to control how much we care about what they say and do, which makes it harder still to keep our tempers in check.
In fact, not having good self-control is probably one of the most common sources of frustration in everyday life—whether at work or home.
It can also cause serious problems with friends and family, as well as lead to depression if you feel like you just can’t get a handle on your feelings.
It may be helpful to know that there are a
number of things you can do to help improve your ability to manage strong
emotions. For example:
Is something wrong with me?
A normal level of stress is completely natural, but if you suffer from anxiety or panic attacks, then it can feel like something is wrong with you.
And while it’s true that some people are more sensitive than others, no one should have to go through what you do.
So do yourself a favor and go talk to a doctor. It may not seem like it at first, but there are ways to cope with your sensitivity.
For example, try breathing exercises: The next time you feel a panic attack coming on, take several deep breaths in and out through your nose.
This will help slow down your heart rate so that you don’t get so
worked up over every little thing.
Why am I such an angry person?
Anger can be a lot of things—frustration, disappointment, hurt, sadness—so it’s important to identify exactly what is making you angry.
(Sometimes people aren’t aware that their emotions are bubbling over until they come face-to-face with another person who can calmly communicate what’s wrong).
For now, try keeping a journal of when you feel angry and why. Next time you get mad at someone or something, stop and ask yourself if your reaction was really appropriate.
If not, think about how you might have handled it
differently. Remember: It’s better to admit you were wrong than to let an
argument escalate into an all-out fight.
What are some ways to build my anger management skills?
There are many ways you can build up your anger management skills.
Exercise is a great way to help curb your anger, because not only will it release stress in our bodies and minds, but it will make us stronger and feel good about ourselves.
You should also try to limit the number of people that you talk to about problems, because usually when we discuss our problems with others we tend to become angrier.
It’s always best just keep things within yourself as much as possible.
Finally, if you find yourself getting angry often at certain times of day or night, then it would be wise to change those times.
For example, if you get angry during work hours every day then try going home
early so that you don’t have time to get upset at work anymore.
Where can I learn more about managing my own anger?
While some of us may naturally be more prone to anger than others, everyone can learn ways to manage their own emotions.
Take a look at these sources of information on managing one’s emotions Anger Management Online Course (WebMD),
Anger Management Group Therapy (Psychology Today), 8 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger:
Learning to Manage Anger (Parenting Today).
There are also several books available about managing one’s anger and negative emotions:
The No-Cry Discipline Solution: Gentle Ways to Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Nagging or Yelling by Elizabeth Pantley;
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey; Managing Your Emotions So You Can Manage Your Life by Matthew McKay, Martha Davis, and Patrick Fanning.
Conclusion
Anger is our response to what we see as unfair treatment.
While it can be a useful, motivating emotion, at times it can get out of control and lead us into damaging behaviors.
Here are 5 things you can do before you say or do something you regret.
These tips may seem obvious – but sometimes when we’re angry we don’t always act in our own best interests!
So if
you’re feeling frustrated, try these strategies to calm down. You might even
find that they help you manage your anger more effectively in future too!
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